Kad upoznaš Anđela

 
 
  
Radujte se, sve je moguće u životu. Moguće je i upoznati Anđela.
Odkad znam za sebe, pitam se šta to tražim od života? Šta radim, šta preduzimam, izgovaram, zašto se budim i ležem? Zašto ovo pišem i šta je moja svrha?
A onda sam iznenda dobila odgovor – Trazim Anđela.
Ako budem imala sreće, mozda ću ih videti više od jednog, ali tada, to je bio prvi u mom životu.
Tražiti Anđela koji ne može tako lako da se prepozna i nema ništa što bi ga odalo na prvi pogled, nije mi nikada padalo na pamet.
Nisam znala da Anđeli žive medju ljudima i da, ako ih prepoznaš, život ti se pretvara u najlepšu bajku.
 
Neki glas mi uporno pomagao u spoznaji istine o bajkovitom životu. Ispričao mi je između ostalog i ovo:
“Drago moje dete, nije sve na prvi pogled baš takvo. Ljudi misle da vide i da imaju oči. Mnogima se tokom života zamuti slika pred očima i nikada više nisu sposobni da izoštre vid. Taj strašan parazit koji im se useli u oči toliko ih oslepi da oni u stvari samo misle da vide svoju stvarnost, a zapravo im se ništa od svega toga ne dogadja.“ Ovaj glas koji se uvek pojavi nenajavljeno toliko je mek i pun ljubavi a istovremeno siguran i određen kao da je sama istina odlučila da se sipa u moju svest. 
 
-Kako ih ne bole oči, začudila me je ova priča.
-Zato što ništa ne osete i nisu u stanju da ga osete. Kad ih napadne ovaj parazit, u svemu samo vide razlog za brigu, strah i pometnju. Veoma je zarazan i prelazi naravno sa starijih na mladje i tako u nedogled.
-Jesu i moji mama i tata zarazeni?, izletelo mi je. – Jesu! I skoro im je nemoguće da prihvate da imaju u sebi uzrok svih svojih problema, a ne u nekom drugom.
-Ja to ipak ne razumem, kako?
-Kad parazit zamulja oči, onda one vide kako su drugi uglavnom negativni i neprijateljski raspoloženi. Parazit samo malo ostavi mesta za najbliže ljude unaokolo. To svet i spašava da se ne pobiju svi medjusobno oko para, teritorije, religije, pozicije, moći, autoriteta, uticaja, lične važnosti i sličnih prolaznosti. Ali i ti dobri odnosi se često brzo pokvare jer na kraju parazit ipak nadje nešto sto će da iskrivi i kod tih najbližih, a što ce da ga nahrani. Zato se često i oni koji se vole na kraju zamrze.
-Kao moji mama i tata?, opet ja pokušavam da shvatim.
-Da! To znači da je tvoja mama prvo videla divnu i srećnu sliku tvog tate. Veremenom, parazit je napredovao, menjao jednu po jednu stvar i oči su joj iskrivile taj njegov lepi lik. Kad se smejao, ona je mislila da se joj se ruga, ako je bio namršten, mislila je da ga nervira. I obrnuto. Njena lepa kosa sad ga je nervirala jer se možda svidja nekom drugom muškarcu, svaku reč je doživljavao kao njeno čantranje i kritiku.
-Hoćeš da kažes da je parazit kriv što su se razveli?
-Da! Sve je u očima. Ako zadržiš dovoljno dugo taj dečiji iskren pogled, videćeš sve sama čuda. Život postaje ono što zovete bajka jer je sve moguće manifestovati u realnosti. Sve oko tebe je razlog za radost.
-Kako mozemo biti uvek srećni? konačno sam prestala da zapitkujem o roditeljima. Iako je njihov razvod ostavio neka sećanja, mislila sam da me to uopšte ne zanima u životu.
-Ako upoznaš Anđela! Ako ti se posreći da ga vidiš, tvoj život se pretvara u blagostanje i raj na zemlji. On se ne vidi na prvi pogled.
-Hocu da zadržim svoj pogled i da vidim Andjela. Kaži mi kako.
-Najvažnije je da oči budu dobro otvorene jer Anđeo može da ti promakne. On ili ona izgledaju kao i drugi ljudi na prvi pogled, ali ako im se zagledas u oči, možeš videti nešto nebesko u njima. Zato su često svetlooki. Možeš ih sresti na viskokim planinama jer moraju biti blizi neba, u svom prirodnom okruženju. Vole da lete, možda se sretnete i u avionu. Oni su brzi i nekako se ne kače ni za šta i ni za koga, kao da lebde. Imaju iskren osmeh i htećeš da ih zagrlis bez ikakvog razloga. Iznenada, shvatiš kako se u tebi razliva mirnoća i osećaj neopisive slobode. Kao da nema ništa na ovom svetu što bi moglo da ugrozi lepotu u tvojim očima.
-Kako da sačuvam bistar pogled i prepoznam nekog Anđela?
-Vežbaj da gledaš u to što ti je pred očima. Ne razmišljaj o nečem drugom i ne konstruiši ništa u vezi sa tim sto vidiš. Gledaj i vidi. Ljudi gledaju i ne vide.
Ne komentariši, ne razmatraj, to je parazitov stav o svetu. To više nije stvar, sama po sebi nego tvoja mera te stvari-lepa, ružna, dosadna ili ovakva, onakva.
I sad dok slušaš mene, nemoj mi verovati, slagati se sa mnom ili misliti da razumeš ili ne razumeš. Samo slušaj. Ne tumači me, jer odmah se pojavljuje zamućenost. Ništa ne možes videti osim samim gledanjem.
-Zar ne gledaju svi?
-Da, i ne vide ono što je ispred njih, vide konstukciju inficiranu parazitom. On oboji pogled svojim zlim idejama i pokvari sve što je pred tobom. Oteraj ga! Ja nešto pričam, otvaram i zatvaram usta, s vremena na vreme se nasmejem, govorim ti blalblabla. To je gledanje i slušanje. Na kraju samo znaš. Znaš jer osećaš to.
 
-A sta bi bilo da sam zamućena parazitskim pogledom na svet?
-Rekla bi: „Ti pricas veoma zanimljivu ili dosadnu priču, sigrno hoćeš da mi ukažeš na ovo ili ono…razumeš?
-Ne razumem!
-Dobro, probudi se i probaj da shvatiš.
E tako sam ja davno slušala moj tajenstveni glas i nisam znala, nisam osećala šta je hteo da mi kaže. Kad sam se probudila i videla jednog dana slučajno oči Anđela, sve sam znala i razumela. 

Život  je postao bajka, a sve oko mene je razlog za radost. 

When You Meet an Angel
Rejoice! Anything is possible. It is even possible to meet an Angel.
For as long as I could remember I’ve wondered about what I want from life. What am I doing, undertaking, uttering, why do I wake up and go to sleep?
Why am I writing this and what is my purpose?
And then suddenly, I got my answer – I am searching for an Angel.
If I’m lucky, I’ll see more than one, but on that occasion, it was the first one in my life.
It never occurred to me to look for an Angel, who is difficult to recognize and bears nothing to give it away at first glance.
I didn’t know Angels lived among us and that if you recognize them your life will turn into the most beautiful fairytale.
A persistent voice helped me to grasp the truth about the fairytale life. Among other things, this is what it told me:
“My dear child, nothing is always as it seems at first glance. People think they see and have eyes. The vision of many becomes blurred as they go through life and they are unable to see clearly ever again. That horrible parasite inhabits their eyes rendering them blind. They only think they see their reality, but in fact, nothing of the things they see is actually happening.”
This voice always appears unannounced and is so soft and filled with love, but also confident and determined, as if truth itself had decided to flow into my consciousness.
“How is it that their eyes don’t hurt?” I was astonished by this story.
“Because the eyes don’t feel anything and aren’t able to feel the pain. When this parasite attacks, all people see is a reason for worry, fear and turmoil. It’s extremely contagious and, of course, it is passed on from adults to children and so on indefinitely.”
“Are my mom and dad infected as well?” I blurted out.
 “Yes! And it is almost impossible for them to accept that the cause for all their problems lies in them and not someone else.”
“I still don’t understand, how?”
“When the parasite blurs their vision, all they see is the negativity and unfriendliness of others. The parasite only leaves a small area for those closest to them. This is the only thing keeping them from killing each other over money, territory, religion, positions, power, authority, influence, self-importance and such transient matters. But these good relationships are also often spoiled because, in the end, the parasite still finds something to distort in those closest to us and feed itself. This is why love often turns to hate.”
“Like my mom and dad?” again I try to make heads or tails of this.
“Yes! This means that at first your mother had a wonderful, happy image of your dad. As time passed, the parasite spread and changed things, one by one, distorting his beautiful image. When he smiled, she though he was mocking her, when he was somber, she thought he was annoyed by her. And the other way around. Her beautiful hair began to bother him because some other man might find it attractive; her every word seemed like nagging and criticism.”
“Are you saying that the parasite is the reason why they got a divorce?”
“Yes! It’s all in the eyes. If you keep this childlike innocent vision long enough, you will see nothing but miracles. Life becomes what you call a fairytale because anything is possible in reality. Everything around you gives you joy.”
“How can we be happy all the time?” I finally stopped asking about my parents. Although their divorce left me with certain feelings, I thought I didn’t really care.
“If you meet an Angel! If you are lucky enough to see him, your life will turn to bliss and heaven on earth. You can’t see him at first glance.”
“I want to keep my eyes on him and see the Angel. Tell me how.”
“The most important thing is to keep your eyes wide open because you might miss seeing him. He or she looks like any other person at first glance, but if you stare into their eyes you will be able to see something heavenly. This is why they often have light eyes. You can find them high in the mountains because they need to be near heaven, in their natural surroundings. They love to fly; you might meet one in an airplane. They’re fast and they don’t hang on to anyone or anything, as if they are floating. They have a sincere smile and you will get the urge to give them a hug for no apparent reason. Suddenly, you will be overwhelmed by a feeling of peace and indescribable freedom. As if there is nothing in the world that could jeopardize the beauty in your eyes.”
“How can I retain this bright vision and recognize an Angel?”
“Practice looking at what’s before your eyes. Don’t think about other things or construct ideas about what you see. Look and see. People look but they don’t see.
Don’t comment or fall to thinking; this is the parasites attitude towards the world. This is no longer a thing in itself but rather your measure of it – beautiful, ugly, boring or whatever.
Even now, as you are listening to me, don’t believe me, agree with me or think you understand or don’t understand. Just listen. Don’t interpret me because the blurriness will start to appear. You can’t see anything by any other means except by looking.”
“Doesn’t everyone look?”
“Yes, and they don’t see what’s in front of them, they see a structure infected by the parasite. It paints your vision with his evil ideas and ruins everything you see before you. Drive him away! I am talking, opening and closing my mouth, smiling from time to time, telling you bla bla bla. This is watching and listening. In the end you just know. You know because you’re feeling it.”
“And what would happen if I my eyes were blurred by the parasite’s vision of the world?”
“You would say: ‘You are telling me a very interesting or boring story, you probably want to point out this or that to me… understand?”
“I don’t understand!”
“Alright, wake up and try to understand.”
This was how, a long time ago, I listened to my mysterious voice, without knowing or feeling what it was trying to tell me. When I awakened one day and accidently saw the eyes of an Angel, I knew and understood everything.
Life became a fairytale, and everything around me a reason for joy.

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